Betty Comden and Adolph Green
music by Leonard Bernstein

EILEEN AND RUTH

WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY, OH --
WHY DID I EVER LEAVE OHIO?
WHY DID I WANDER TO FIND WHAT LIES YONDER
WHEN LIFE WAS SO COZY AT HOME?

WONDRING WHILE I WANDER,
WHY DID I FLY?
WHY DID I ROAM?
OH, WHY OH, WHY OH
DID I LEAVE OHIO?
MAYBE ID BETTER GO

EILEEN RUTH
HOME. O -- H -- I -- O.


EILEEN AND RUTH

MAYBE ID BETTER GO HOME.


RUTH

NOW LISTEN, EILEEN,
OHIO WAS STIFLING.
WE JUST COULDNT WAIT TO GET OUT OF THE PLACE,
WITH MOM SAYING -- RUTH, WHAT NO DATE FOR THIS EVENING?



EILEEN

AND POP WITH, EILEEN, DO BE HOME, DEAR, BY TEN.


RUTH AND EILEEN

UGH!


RUTH

THE GOSSIPY NEIGHBORS
AND EVERYONE YAPPING WHOS GOING WITH WHOM --


EILEEN

AND DATING THOSE DRIPS THAT IVE KNOWN SINCE IM FOUR.


RUTH

THE KIWANIS CLUB DANCE.


EILEEN

ON THE BASKETBALL FLOOR.


RUTH

COUSIN MAUDE WITH HER LECTURES ON SIN --


RUTH AND EILEEN

WHAT A BORE!


EILEEN

JERRY BLACK!


RUTH

COUSIN MIN!


EILEEN

EZRA NYE!


RUTH

HANNAH FINN!


EILEEN

HOPELESS!


RUTH

BABBITY!


EILEEN

STUFFY!


RUTH

PROVINCIAL!


RUTH AND EILEEN

THANK HEAVENS WERE FREE!

WHY, OH WHY, OH WHY, OH --
WHY DID WE EVER LEAVE OHIO?!

WONDRING WHILE WE WANDER,
WHY DID WE FLY?
WHY DID WE ROAM?
OH, WHY OH, WHY OH
DID WE LEAVE OHIO?
MAYBE WED BETTER GO

EILEEN RUTH
HOME. O -- H -- I -- O.


RUTH AND EILEEN

MAYBE WED BETTER GO HOM